Tale of the Tether - Dan C. Smith

The following post was chosen as one of the winning entries for our Return to Cantha contest.
You can find the author of this piece on Twitter: @Avenrise

I am sylvari Commander Thereon Avenrise, and I am very humbled that you are interested in my story. Having emerged from the Dream of Dreams with the name Avenrise bestowed upon me almost immediately I felt what can be only described as an unusual link between myself and another. In my infancy I feared that I had been somehow changed in mind, corrupted by the Nightmare. I sought advice from Pale Mother but was told that I should instead embrace this link, and so after a short period of reflection I felt another name call out to me and adopted a second name, ‘Thereon’.

I am sure by now you have already heard of the many trials and tribulations that myself and my dear friends have endured to ensure peace remains in Tyria, so I will not regale you with long tales that you may already know. What is not until now common knowledge is the personal struggle that I have been through during these events attempting to understand the nature of this ‘cosmic tether’. In trying to understand the tether I have gained valuable insight into my own shortcomings and my personal strengths, giving me the courage needed to step up when needed as the Commander. 

The loss of Warmaster Kernsson was a powerful reminder to me that life, while beautiful and precious, is fleeting. The events of Claw Island taught me the value of courage in the face of adversity. But with this lesson came the painful realisation that not only was I battling Risen hoard and the might of Zhaitan, I was battling something inside of me. The tether felt like a distraction, and this feeling did not subside. It grew more fierce with every coming battle. 

The formation of the Pact and subsequent push into Orr threw up more questions than answers as I battled not only with the task at hand but with the perception of not giving all of myself as I fought alongside Tyria’s great heroes to bring down the Elder Dragon Zhaitan. During the battle for Lion’s Arch and Scarlet Briar’s eventual demise I felt distant, almost separated from reality as I struggled against both the Molten Alliance and the thorns growing larger inside of me. Then followed the loss of Eir Stegalkin, the persecution of the sylvari race during Mordremoth’s influence and then finally the felling of my mentor Trahearne. From an outsider's perspective I was the all powerful Pact Commander battling Elder Dragons with the help of my allies and vanquishing all foes in my path. Inside I was a confused tangle of vines pulsating to the rhythm of another.  

After the events that took place in the Heart of Maguuma I took some time to be among friends, away from both the rapturous glee of victory and the misdirected judgement of myself as a sylvari. My dear friend Braeseff Olfaosson imparted me with the peace needed to focus my mind, along with some rather delicious evening meals. My little confidante Kaeoja helped me to understand that there must be a logic to the tether but that staring at it head on was not going to solve the riddle. She advised me to take a look at the problem from all other angles… and she did so with some rather strange interpretive dance moves. Ever the entertainer! The culmination of our many nights of thought and merriment was that in order to unpick the knots that the tether had tied I had to stop thinking of the tether as something that is foreign. I had to embrace the link as something that is fundamental to my very being and open up to my closest allies about my personal struggles. Only then could I start to understand its purpose.